On Happiness & Willpower

I have two more Steve Chandler books to read and I'm only three quarters the way through the first one, his latest.

Perhaps I like his style so much because his approach is informal -- kind of like mine, so there's an immediate connection.

He also makes a number of great analogies and uses examples to demonstrate important emotional topics such as winning, losing, succeeding, aspirations, inspiration, growing old and the power of conscious creation.

Insertion of quotes throughout are perfectly selected, including one of my favorites: "And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music." -- Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche.

In his chapter on pleasure versus happiness, he starts with a Neil Young quote on Elvis: "The last time I saw Elvis, he was shooting at a color TV, the phones were ringing in the pink motel and the rest is history."

Here, Steven writes about a friend who 'made it' early on, who he refers to Early Win. Gotta love it. I've met a lot of 'Early Wins' in Silicon Valley.

"He has a nagging feeling he's not........something...he's not something, but what? What is it? Not producing? Not creating? Not contributing? Not important? He can't put his finger on it, so he sets up lots of social encounters with others who also have nothing to do, and together they talk and talk".....and then, "what Early never worked out in his mind was the difference between pleasure and happiness. Pleasure is the ego seeking instant gratification."

Happiness is sustainable and pleasure is not happiness.

In a moment of weakness during my juice fast last week, I opened his book and I automatically landed on page 157 which read: "where do we get our willpower?" Surreal to say the least.

He writes about one of his childhood beliefs and where he thinks that belief connected to his lack of willpower -- "somewhere I programmed in "I CAN'T" for survival. All childhood survival is the survival of potential humiliation."

He continues later on:
"Some pepole have easy access to the "I can" switch that controls their will and power. Some hvae their holes where love or listening or decision-making want to be. But it's all the same void. It's all an absence of the awareness of the power of choice inside of us. A surrender of this power to other people and circumstances, so that life becomes outside-in, is annoying and frightening."

Yes, I agree with you Steve and yet when we allow ourselves to go there and truly surrender, we feel most alive. Like we're truly living.......in a vibrant, explosive, inspiring and fulfilling way. Whenever I think of one of my top three favorite quotes which is a Taoist saying, I always smile and its a smile that brings me immediate peace. --"The whole world surrenders to a quiet mind" --

Tag: Steve Chandler